1955 New York Gotham Book Mart Lecture Photo: Inez Marques
Joel S. Goldsmith
900A – Infinite Nature of Yourself
Unless meditation is understood, and unless the reason for meditation in The Infinite Way is understood, the rest of it doesn’t add up. The rest of the message doesn’t come out even. The reason is this: In the years of my work in seeking, practicing, and in some small measure, demonstrating spiritual wisdom, I learned that it is an impossibility for us to get anything, to achieve anything, or acquire anything. And the reason is that we are already infinite to begin with, and in the beginning we were heirs of God, joint-heirs to all of the heavenly riches. From the very beginning, the Father said, “Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.”
Let us forget now your human experience. It is because of your human experience and mine that we’re here. Your human experience has been a very disappointing one. There isn’t anybody in this room whose human experience hasn’t been disappointing, or they wouldn’t be here. Anyone who was completely satisfied with their lives is so satisfied that they’re not seeking anything. And so the moment we start seeking, it is evidence that we haven’t found, that we haven’t discovered, that we haven’t reached a point of satisfaction, of completeness.
And so it is that we have found our human experience to be disappointing or less than satisfying, less than complete. The Infinite Way, of course, represents my individual experience, and therefore it makes no claim to being all the truth there is in the world. It is the truth as it has been revealed in my individual experience, and so I am not presuming … and like everyone else, at least like everyone else whom I have ever met on this search, I wanted to find something, somewhere, somehow, that would add to my completeness, to my perfection, something that would make me more whole and harmonious than I was at that moment.
And of course, that led to a very long and a very round-about search, because ultimately, I came to the place of realizing that the Master knew exactly what he was teaching when he revealed that “I am” the Son of God, heir of God, and if an heir, joint-heir with Christ to all of the heavenly riches. I knew that scripture was correct when it said, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. I knew that from the spiritual standpoint, eventually I saw that point that you cannot become the Son of God, because in the beginning, before Abraham was, you were already the child of God: joint-heir to all the heavenly riches, but that this had to be realized.
It wasn’t enough to affirm it, it wasn’t enough to declare it. I saw people getting into more trouble than they were originally in by going around with affirmations like, “I am a child of God, and I am spiritual, and I am whole, and I am perfect.” I knew that it was the truth, but that the very affirmations were preventing us from realizing it. Eventually the unfoldment came, that everything that the Master, Christ Jesus, teaches about our relationship with God is true, and was true from the beginning of time, but that it becomes necessary for us to achieve the realization of that truth, the realization of that relationship.
Now then, the question comes, how do we come into the realization of that which we already are? And of course you can see that the clarifying point was right there; that since we already are, there is no need to go out and get it, or demonstrate it, or accomplish it, or achieve it. Nor can we get it by any thought process. But rather, since this is an already established truth, some way, somehow, the realization has to dawn on us within our own being. Now of course, in addition to the fact that the Master revealed that the kingdom of God is within you, [it is] very clear now that there is no place we can go, there is no person to whom we can go, there is no outside influence or power on which we can call, that whatever is necessary must lie within the realm of our own being.
And so there is only one answer now to the search for God. Whether you find a comfortable chair in your home, in the living room, or den, or library, or bedroom, or bathroom, or whether you go to a public library or public reading room, or whether you find an empty lot somewhere or go to a park bench, ultimately you will have to find yourself seated someplace where you can say, “Right here where I am, It is. Right here in the midst of me, right here.” It makes no difference if at this moment my bed is in hell, still It is here. It makes no difference if I am walking through the valley of the shadow of death, still It is here where I am. Whither shall I flee from Thy spirit, from Thy presence. Lo, if I make my bed in hell, Thou art there.
But if all those conditions yielded, and you had perfect health, and perfect wealth, and perfect family life, and perfect home, you still might never find God. But right in the midst of whatever hell you are suffering with … and it makes no difference: sin, disease, death, lack, limitation, whatever it is, in that very position, [you and] I are called upon to realize God. When we do, these hells become heaven. Heated discords are revealed as harmony. Sins, even, disappear, and though we were black yesterday, we are white today.
Now, if you can follow that, you can then see that the next step was a logical one. Since I have to find this God within my own being, and since I am pretty certain that the infinite nature of heaven or God is such that I’ll never find it inside of my body. I know now that I must find it within my consciousness … within my awareness, within range of my awareness or consciousness. And so I can now go off to a corner somewhere, quiet and peaceful as can be, and there engage in a struggle that probably, before I get through will tear me from head to foot, but which must be gone through, because there must be a settling down inside of oneself in order that one can become aware of that which has been called the still, small voice.
It isn’t necessarily a still, small voice. Sometimes it’s so loud you’re sure that the neighbors down the street can hear it. Sometimes it isn’t a voice at all; it’s just a gentle warmth, feeling of a presence. At other times, it is just a release, as if a weight were dropping off the shoulder. It makes no difference in what way it comes or what form, we will refer to it at this moment as the still, small voice. It is as if we were going to listen within our own being for a voice. A little Hebrew lad did that, Samuel. Speak Lord, thy servant heareth. And that’s addressed in here, not in the body, in the awareness, in the consciousness, in the mind, in the soul of one’s being. “Speak Lord, out of the depth of my withinness, speak, reveal Thyself.”
It isn’t easy. We started out in infancy with rattles, and blocks, and trains, and dolls, and all kinds of external toys, and as we grew older, we took up dancing and jingling money in our pockets, and theaters and movies, and lately, radios and televisions, and everything that engages the external awareness, so that we are never at peace unless a noise is going on outside of us. With some people, it amounts almost to a fear to be alone or to be still. And so at first, we have to train ourselves to be still, to be quiet, to be peaceful, to be serene, not to have the clamor going on outside, to learn to retire away from radios, away from noises.
And then, beginning with probably one or two minutes of sitting still, gradually learn to increase it until we really can sit without moving for two whole minutes, or three whole minutes, or four whole minutes, in an attentive state of mind, of consciousness. Now the reason is this: All of the issues of life are within us. If we are seeking health, it is not to be found in the external realm, it is to be found deep, deep down within our consciousness. It will appear externally as the health of the body, but we must first contact it in the withinness. If we are seeking supply, ultimately it will come to us through a position, or investments, or persons, but if we do not first contact it in the inner stillness within our own being, it won’t appear out here as form.